Please note: transcript not 100% accurate.
00:01
I need that time to reset, re-energize and refuel. This is the confusion that an ambivert faces. It’s understanding when we’re extroverted and when we’re introverted.
00:21
This is Dr. Meenal and welcome to Uncover Your Eyes, where we break down the most pressing health topics shaping lives today. Before we start, 69 % of you are subscribed or following the show. I humbly request if more of you can follow or subscribe to the show, we will be able to grow our podcast and give you better episodes weekly. Today, I want to talk about something deeply personal.
00:51
something that has affected me my whole life. And I guess I’ve never kind of found that balance or known where I am. I have always been caught between being an extrovert and an introvert. And when people ask me about my personality, I actually don’t know the answer. Sometimes I say I’m an extrovert. Sometimes I say I’m an introvert. I’m sure many of you feel the same way. We’re ambiverts. And it took me a long time to come to terms with this.
01:20
and to understand it because to me it was always you have to pick a side and be one or the other. How can you be both? Does that even make sense? Symptoms that I was having were being drained after a long day at work or a social setting where I’m talking all day, being around people. And it would confuse people that I’d be drained or would never pick up their phone calls in the evening because I was so chatty and energetic through the same day.
01:49
And if you saw me in a public setting, you would literally believe I was the most chattiest person ever. And you probably see that now and I’m the most extroverted person ever. But I will tell you when I get home, I am royally drained. My battery is drained, shut off. I need silence. And I really struggle with talking on the phone.
02:15
just chatting it up, having parties in the evening. I want to be in bed by nine o’clock. I don’t want to be social if I’ve been social all day. And if I’m going to be social, I need to mentally prepare for that. It really drains me, but I can do it. And people think I’m so extroverted. The moment I walk through the door after a long day at work, chatting with patients, my team, I will sigh in relief and crash on the couch.
02:44
and likely not pick up your phone call and it will go straight to voicemail. And that’s why those of you who know me know that I probably won’t pick up your phone calls in the evening because I need that time to reset, re-energize and refuel almost for the next day. This is the confusion that an ambivert faces. It’s understanding when we’re extroverted and when we’re introverted. And it took me a long time to understand that. And I didn’t
03:14
really know what to expect at what time. Would I go to a party and be introverted or would I go to a party and be extroverted? Would I go to work and be introverted or extroverted? Would I go to the mall with a friend and be introverted or extroverted? I would never really know. But with time, I started to embrace being an ambivert. It’s a beautiful thing to be able to adapt to different situations and that we’re not kind of boxed in this introvert
03:43
or extrovert category. We can be chatty when we need to be chatty and we know our limits and can be quiet when we need to be quiet or have that solitude. We feed off social energy, but only to a certain point where we know we need to stop. And I’m gonna give you some of my tips that I’ve learned over time on how to handle being this ambivert, especially explaining to friends and coworkers and family.
04:12
why you’re not picking up their phone calls all the time, I think that’s really important to know yourself and understand being an ambivert yourself. First thing I’m going to say is know your limits. So plan for a super fun day with friends and know that I need to end at a certain time to go home and be able to say, no, I’ve got to go. The second thing is communicating it. Tell people you’re around that, I love you, but I really need to leave to…
04:41
regain my energy. Otherwise you’re going to face misunderstandings, people being upset with you that you don’t want to hang out with them. So just let them know, communicate it, especially to your family and balance your calendar. For me, I have been through a time when I didn’t balance my calendar. I was constantly working back to back day to day. And I realized my body was shutting down mentally. And then it became physical for me because
05:09
I was not able to take all of that in at once where it was back to back events, whether they were work combined with social activities every day. So balance that calendar, keep a calendar on your phones and know if I’m gonna do this, this is my limit for today. And then, you know, I need a day break where I can just refuel, reenergize and then go out again the next day to do whatever it is, whether it’s work related or social, but have that calendar that caters your needs. Everybody is different.
05:38
For me, I’ve realized it’s not just having that evening free, it’s having the whole next day free that I need to be able to mentally kind of regain that energy. And then self-awareness, that is key, knowing that I don’t always have to be extroverted and being able to be aware of what you need in that moment, that day, and where you need to spend your energy prioritizing that.
06:06
because you are now aware of what is best for you mentally, what you can handle. So if I know I’m not having a great morning, I’m not gonna go out and hang out with all these friends. You know, I’ll have to let them know, hey, I’m not feeling good or hey, I’m just not up for it. I need kind of a breather. It took me a long time to understand these four things where it’s communicating, knowing your limits, balancing your calendar and self-awareness and just…
06:35
embracing that. I mean, I want to say it took me 40 years to understand that and understanding that I was an ambivert. I always say being an ambivert is like going through this crash and burn cycle where, you you need to have, you’re energized and you need to be social and you need to talk to people. But then talking to more people doesn’t help you. You need to be alone and you need to have that state of kind of mindfulness or mental peace. It’s cyclic. It’s, you need that on and off switch going.
07:04
versus just constantly on the go or constantly being in solitude. I have also been in the flip side where I spend days just kind of being on my own. That really can make you fall into a whole new category where you get depressed. You know, there’s the feeling of loneliness, solitude, all of that. So I think it’s understanding that there is a cycle and balancing that is super, super important. So if you’ve ever felt like you have not filled into that extrovert or introvert
07:33
sort of box, you might be an ambivert where you want to have all that energy talking to people, but then you find peace in solitude. And if you’ve ever been the life of the party one day and completely MIA the next day, congratulations, you might just be an ambivert. Thank you listeners and viewers for tuning in. If you want to catch more episodes of Uncover Your Eyes, make sure to follow or subscribe on your favorite podcast platform and on YouTube.
08:03
To learn more about me, follow me on Instagram @Dr.MeenalAgarwal Until next time, keep those eyes uncovered!